The threat

Visitor Rants

I have been living under the threat of death for the past 3 years, and last year was probably my most challenging. There are days now where I cruise through the aisles at Woolworth’s and suddenly feel a panic attack, where I start to palpitate and sweat. I’ve learnt to stop, focus on any item on the shelf and start to count slowly. This surprisingly is quite effective and I rarely reach 15 before I start to normalise, I’m sure one day in the future they will have a name for this disorder and assign it to an excess of Internet and Radio wave thingy’s that zap through our space to reach our treasured iPhones. There was a time that even doctors endorsed smoking, because it was cool. Science will catch up one day and we will all have some cause for a class action against these technological advances … Bring back the horse and buggy! The methane gas from horse poo was insignificant and barely scraped the ozone levels. In fact, it created a job opportunity for horse poo scrapers. I’m a Survivor … and I’ve never been on that popular Survivor series, but I’ve driven up every day to the local Westfield mall, grabbed a ticket from the car-park vending robot, and tried to cheat that little monkey arm swinging cricket bat. Brad and I have a competition, where we try to rip out the car-park ticket and try to get as much of the next ticket on the roller. Up until 30 minutes ago, I was a clear winner, but Brad has snapped at least half of the next ticket along with his own ticket. : ( So cool when when your son brings home 3 gorgeous chicks!

Monday, April 16th

Visitor Rants

Thank you ‘Stilnox’. I actually experienced what most of you take for granted, a sound sleep till around 6am this morning. I have also discovered that this has to be the prescription that’s giving me mild headaches in the morning. Can’t win them all, ‘sleep’ or ‘headache’?, ‘good’ or ‘bad’?, ‘party all night’ or ‘hangover’? Why does yin have to accompany yang like an uninvited guest? Incidentally, did you know yin is cold, dark, passive, wet and feminine, and that yang is bright, active, dry, hot and masculine? I know a couple of people who are best described as yin, … I’m definitely yang, a yang who loves the rain! I can also confirm “Stilnox’ hasn’t caused me to sleep walk and go into a murderous rampage, but the side effects on my memory is shocking. I wouldn’t feel so slack about it, if it weren’t for the people around me reminding me that I had forgotten something, or I sit there struggling with names or events. A classic example was at French lessons, when the teacher held up a poster with well known faces and we had to introduce them in French. I got away by introducing Julia Gillard as the ‘woman in red’, and Barrack Obama as the ‘black president’. I’m hoping this is all temporary or just one unpleasant dream that I’m about to wake up from. Which sadly, I’ve made so many friends in this dream I’m going to miss them all.

Sunday, 15th April – Video

Visitor Rants

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PanmzRhhXBI]

Laho is not a good word.

Visitor Rants

My youngest daughter dabbled with the Hawaiian language while we were away, with the words used most being ‘greetings’ and ‘thank you’, respectively, ‘aloha’ and ‘mahalo’. In her bid to display this newly acquired knowledge, she would often say ‘ma laho’. The word ‘laho’ in Niuean means ‘penis’. Communicating effectively involves dialogue that is understood as intended by the parties involved. I came to the realisation during our holidays and for the greater part of this time that we communicated very well with people outside the sphere of our immediate family.

Technology has made this so easy and convenient that it’s actually quite intrusive. One night while I was enjoying this succulent lobster that had survived the dangers in the sea only to land on my plate coated with the most beautiful garnish and juices, I noticed my other half texting, and my older children either playing games or updating their Facebook posts. My youngest daughter and I were actually the only one’s savoring the moment. She of course by this stage had gotten past the male anatomy and was greeting people correctly. I’m not sure if I would have survived the impending kick in the ass, slap across the face or other physical or verbal abuse I would have struck if I did the same thing 30 or 40 years ago at the dinner table. Back then you simply came to the table, ate your meal and your attention was only with those around you. You interjected politely with conversation or spoke only when spoken to. It was a brief moment in the day to edify your family bond. I miss those days. Oh enough rambling, good morning sweet iPad, let me wrap you back up snugly while I catch up on some lost sleep.

Swam with a turtle

Visitor Rants

When I was small my mother and closest aunties called me ‘fonu’ right up until they passed away, which in the Niuean language means turtle. The name fonu became so commonplace, that I just don’t think they knew my real name. My mother spoke the tiniest bit of English and being the eldest, I was her translator for a great deal of the time. She spoke to me in broken English, and I replied back in broken Niuean. The reason for being called fonu was never explained to me, so I’m wondering whether it was the way I moved when I was a hatchling. Or, perhaps there was no adequate translation for the name ‘David’ and they thought, ‘what the heck, lets call him turtle’. I would like to think, that it’s symbolic for being ahead or beating something even when it looks like the odds are up against you. Today, I snorkeled at Black Rock, Maui and came very close to a Green sea turtle. It must have been close to 5′ in length and glided past me en-route to the ocean. I could not even attempt to describe this experience. This will forever be one of the highlights on this trip.

The threat

Monday, April 16th

Sunday, 15th April – Video

Laho is not a good word.

Swam with a turtle

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