I watched a documentary recently, and one thing I learnt was that almost every species on PLANET EARTH engages in homosexual activity. However, we humans are the only one’s who have made homophobia a contentious and frequent topic of discussion. You gotta love the Discovery Channel. We would also have to be the dumbest species to have the word ‘suicide’ added into our vocabulary. I could be wrong, but I’ve yet to witness a bug fly directly into a spiders web having considered that all his options in life had come to an end, or a grizzly bear precariously balanced over the edge of some cliff not coping with the breakdown of relationship with mama bear. It’s got to easier being a monkey, my main worries would simply be where I would get my next bunch of bananas. I love bananas in my smoothie, and I love mangoes … though I’m not sure if monkeys love mangoes? It’s Bens 13th birthday this weekend and my credit card magnetic strip is poised for the anticipated wear and tear. He’s already called this morning and all I can remember is XBox, Star Wars Lego, Halo and Assassins Creed. The list was much longer, I doubt he will be concentrating on school work today. Catcha’s

I sent a probe into my brain last Thursday, and the surge of brilliance encouraged me to get a flight to Auckland to visit my sister and brother. My appetite for self sabotage wasn’t balanced at all, and I needed to seek some refuge to get myself into calmer waters. The picture I took over the weekend is from a Niuean Festival I attended on my sisters invitation. It was a simple envelope, scribbled with a message from the Niuean Elderly women who attended. On it, it says, that I was awarded $20 for being a good dancer, and because they didn’t know my name, they referred to me as the ‘man with the white shirt’. I’m sure this is how Michael Jackson felt when he was much much younger. I’m back in Sydney and the weather is no different to Auckland. The Rugby was a disappointing draw.

What an awesome sight, while taking out friends on the boat over the weekend, around 12 to 15 dolphins swam into the bay. A few even came close to the boat, and almost everyone were in awe at this graceful setting on a beautiful Sunday morning. I’ve never seen dolphins in Sydney, let alone a bay along the Hawkesbury river. We immediately nicknamed one ‘Scar’ as her dorsal fin was jagged. We maintained our interest in Scar’s movement in the water creating stories for this creature as we watched her circling in the bay. Do I have to go to work this morning?

I have four children who lean on me for emotional or financial support. There’s a time line that determines when your younger children will cherish the emotional support, and the ones who have reached 12 years plus are interested in a chaffeur and an endless wad of cash. Wish I was young again, but my parents were poor. I have learnt a number of skills in this phase of my life, lots of gourmet pizza’s, cooking the perfect mud crab, and blue swimmers, great healthy sandwiches with the best cold meats, salads and cheese, and lots of seafood, steamed. But, still not enough sleep. My daughter Jess came over this weekend and chipped in with her ‘support your daddy’ skills. I feel absolutely spoilt (and the credit card is now worn out), thanks Jess. Brad won 2 gold medals at Ju Jitsu, having fought 8 fights and winning 7 by submission and the last one on points. I think I can still clip him around the ears and get away with it?

Well folks, here’s the image of a potential cocktail of death lollies which in a momentary lapse of judgement or sanity could be extremely dangerous. ‘Stilnox’ was suspected as the possible cause of death for our infamous thespian joker, Heath Ledger. I liked Heath a lot, such a sudden and early loss to the Australian Acting Industry and to his family. Oh, and guess what? I have a packet of these candies in my medicine cabinet. I can take these at my leisure to assist with my troubling insomnia. Meanwhile, I tether and try to cope with my depression, I have to muster the strength not to self diagnose with too much Stilnox, which can be tempting during my dark moments. Go figure? I take Zoloft for the depression, and if that doesn’t work, I can chew my troubles away with Stilnox. I have decided to stop taking Stilnox as I completely lost one day this week. Ziltch, zero, nothing … I have no memory nor recollection from Tuesday noon till Wednesday night. Funny thing is that I experienced what they refer to as a side effect to the drug … ‘sleep walking’ … and of all places I gravitated to the local train station, watched trains, and somehow ended back home after 10pm on Tuesday. Brad offered me this insight the next day because he said I explained how I went bush walking and eventually sat down to keep watch on the timetable. I can’t remember a damn thing, except the trains, and I thought it was a dream. Everything else is a total blank. I actually woke up in a daze on Wednesday, believing it was still Tuesday. Gotta laugh, … yup, gotta laugh, now. Not sure how I navigated my way across 6 lanes of road to get where I was heading to, and back safely? Perhaps there was a carnage, flaming cars, and wreckage left in my wake, … I just don’t know. Last night, I set the iPad on YouTube and searched for a variety of ‘Meditation for Insomnia’ results. I played 3 different meditations, each one giving me about an hour of sleep in between each one. I’m sure I’ll find one that will set me to a deeper more lengthy slumber … one night … one night soon. On a final note, anyone seen the movie, Silver Lining Playbook? I totally relate to it, it was well directed and absolutely brilliant. The girl was in ‘Hunger Games’ and I’m sure everyone knows Bradley Cooper.

Love Hurts. Click here to watch the trailer!